Updates

Things have been incredibly crazy lately. I've been dealing with trying to figure out a way to more effectively discipline the kids because what we have been doing has not been working very well. SO...I've started praying each morning for a good day with them both...that they would listen and obey and basically be sweet. Is that too much to ask?? I hope not. I have also been praying for me...for my attitude, my reactions to their actions and for a sweet spirit to model before them. Any good days we've had has DEFINITELY been because of Jesus and the work of the Holy Spirit. I have need of so many changes to be the mom that I know He wants me to be. I'm just trying to give the control back to the Owner....the only One that can control it all.
Secondly, I started a chore chart to help get our mornings started more efficiently. It includes simple things like making their beds, getting dressed, brushing teeth, picking up their rooms...that sort of thing. There are rewards if they get all check marks for the week. I am rethinking this though. I want to be able to reward them each time they obey. So I think I'm going to try to find some marbles and a jar. Label it in sections so that when they reach a certain section they get a certain reward. Each time they obey, they get a marble. Each time they disobey, they get one taken away. We'll see how it works.
I've also been preparing to start school back up on Monday, March 2nd. I've been researching the curriculums available, and I think I've found one that might work for Emma. Ethan, my nephew, and Emma are natured a LOT alike. Pam has been using this with him and it seems to be working well for them. I'm gonna try it. For now, that's all I'm going to do for at least a week. Then, I'm going to add some Bible stuff. Then, maybe math. I just don't want to frustrate her (or me) like I did before I quit in October. I have to show Don that I can and WILL do this if he's going to agree to let me homeschool her for her kindergarten year. The past couple of days I've been trying to get my school room in order to start school again. It's gotten kind of bad so the reorganization has been good. I'm also trying to figure out when to school. Afternoon works better for me but not for her. SO, if I do it in the morning, I have to plan something for Chloe & Tate (the 2 year old little boy that I keep).
Pam has started selling Pampered Chef. So they past few weeks I've been able to get out of the house going to shows with her. It has been a lot of fun not to mention lots of sister time. :) I'm still doing the Stepping Up Bible study. It has been really good. I haven't liked it as much as Believing God, but I have enjoyed it. So as you can see, I have been busy. I am really going to try to blog a little more often. Thanks for being faithful to read. I know I shock your socks off when I've actually updated the blog. Until next time....

Control

I'm learning a thing or 2 about myself....I'm a control freak. I surely didn't realize that about myself. (I'm slightly OCD too, but that's just a side note.) I'm taking a parenting class at church. I struggle so much with trying to raise my girls. I long for them first and foremost to have a growing love relationship with Jesus Christ. I'm learning that they both seem to be very strong-willed. I really didn't think it was possible to have 2 children THAT strong-willed. I think maybe I need the super nanny. Don't laugh....I'm dead serious.

Emma doesn't respond much to any of the discipline that I've tried. That discipline does include spanking, time out, and taking away toys & TV just to name a few. For instance, Emma doesn't want to clean her room. Yes, it is a personal preference of mine for her to keep it clean, but it's also a life skill that she needs to learn. By clean, I really just mean picking up...not vacuuming or dusting....just picking up and hanging up clothes and putting away toys. We get to the point of her crying and me crying. I've thought...maybe I should just clean it up...it would take less time and be done just the way I like it (I'm not even picky about the how as long as she attempts to put things away). But...I want her to be responsible. Is this age too young for that? She's not a compliant child AT ALL. So what do I do? Any suggestions? Please help. I've told her before..."Emma, if you don't pick up your toys, I'll do it. Then, I'll pack them away and you will not be allowed to play with them." Know what she said??? "Mommy, you go ahead and pick them up...I don't want to play with them anymore." WHAT???!!! She wasn't being disrespectful in her tone at all....just being sweet as could be. So what do you do??

Oh well....this is not how I was expecting this entry to go. I just need some help. I want to control her basically...want her to do just what I want her to do. But I'm learning in my class, that that is not the answer because you will get to the point one day when you're not bigger than her. Relationships and influence is what is going to help determine how she responds in certain situations. AHHH....this is so hard. I'm praying now for a Spirit-filled attitude and demeanor with my kids (and husband). If you're still reading, thanks for letting me "vent" my frustrations here.

Emma Stories

I have just a couple of stories to tell about Emma. She is constantly cracking me up. The other day Don & she were riding in the van. She was asking for drink of sprite that was in the cup holder at the front. She was begging actually because she said she was THIRRRRSTYYYY! Shortly after expressing that, the bell on the van went off for low fuel. Emma looked up and said, "I guess the van is thirsty too, huh, Daddy?" Intuitive.

On a more serious note, I would ask you to pray for Emma and her salvation. She has been asking some really thought provoking questions about sin and Jesus and asking Him into her heart lately. One particular evening we were on our way to church on a Wednesday night. After trying desperately to seek the wisdom of Jesus for explanations of answers that a 4 year old would understand, I told Don I was exhausted when we ended our 35 minute drive to church....mentally and spiritually.

My Help

I'm not sure where to even begin. Every time I make my way to the computer (feeling oh so guilty that I haven't blogged in FOREVER), I'm overwhelmed with the thought of blogging. Overwhelmed because there's so much I need to catch you up on....because my heart is so heavy...because I'm a slacker! :)

I have such a desire to share just what the Lord has been trying to teach me in the past couple of weeks. However, I struggle to put my feelings and emotions into words sometimes. Is it just me? Probably...

I think about a friend of a friend that I had been praying for. She went home to be with Jesus yesterday morning leaving behind a husband and 3 very small boys. My girls have driven me to an inexpressible amount of frustration this evening. I bet that mom would have LOVED to have stayed here to experience that...just to get to be a part of her boys' lives.
I think about a little 13 year old boy in our area that without the miraculous Hand of Jesus will pass away sometime this weekend. I bet his mom would love to be able to say that she was "driven to an inexpressible amount of frustration".
I think about a close friend of mine that LONGS so deeply for a child. How she got the call 2 weeks ago that her and her husband had been chosen for a unborn baby boy. They frantically tried to get things together on the legal end and on the home end after he was born 2 days later at 24 weeks. A week later he died. How she too would love that frustration.
What am I getting at? I don't understand what Jesus is doing. I don't understand the decisions He makes...the trials we are allowed to go through whether they are as huge as death of a loved one or as small as the daily frustrations of life.

I do know that He sees each tear we cry....He hears each cry for help that we utter....He hears each praise through each storm that we pass through...we serve an ALL-KNOWING God...a Compassionate God....a Loving God. It is NOT a sin to be confused by what He's doing because we do not have the mind of Christ. Therefore...

Psalm 121
"I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand. The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul. The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore."

Retreat

Don & I are headed out this morning for a great getaway weekend at Myrtle Beach, SC. Our church is hosting a couples' retreat. We are so excited for much needed couple time. Don's parents are here from OH to spend time with the girls. For those of you who are thinking how in the world did they make it here with the snow storm they just hand, relax. They came on Tuesday BEFORE the storm. They had planned on coming on Wednesday but changed the plans when they saw the storm coming. I'm praying for a renewed and refreshed relationship with the man God has blessed me with.
I have started a new Bible Study that has shown me some things about myself that I'll share here at a later date. I need to approach my family much differently than I do now. I promise to update SOON and explain. Thanks for sticking with me!

My Performer

Well...Emma has become quite the little performer. She loves to "dress" up and perform shows for us with the help of Gracie & Ethan, my niece and nephew. Here's her latest "outfit". I am going to video these shows one of these days, and I'll post for your enjoyment. She's a hoot!

Snow Days!

On Tuesday, we had the most snow we've had in a LONG time here in NC. I was very doubtful when the weather dude said there would be snow. (They seem to always be wrong.) Not this time. My kids & Pam's kids had a blast. Ok...I'm not fooling anyone...I had a blast too. Phil hooked a sled to the back of his Suzuki. It would really only hold 2-3 kids though. So Don went up to Mama's and got the other "sled". Some years back when we got snow, Charlie went to a junk yard and bought the hood of a car to make into a sled. So, that's what Don hooked to his Suzuki. It was really rednecked-up, but boy was it fun. Don was off work on Tuesday and Wednesday so he was able to pull the kids both days. Here are some pictures...

Emma, Chloe, Gracie & Ethan

Emma

Chloe (at a good moment)

Don pulling the "sled".

Phil pulling the other sled.